We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
