She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Actions speak louder than pants.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
