she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Randomize
