Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
