I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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