it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
