We're facebook friends in real life
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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