i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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