elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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