If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
