one might say we're banned from that church
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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