Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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