and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
