Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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