Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
