I'm sorry my penis didn't work
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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