Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
