OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
