Taylor Swift is so right about you.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
