I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
