Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
