we have pet lesbian snakes
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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