I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
