no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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