YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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