He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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