More tranny stories later!
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
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