dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
