ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
wrigley field is MILF paradise
He kissed a someone with a penis
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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