that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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