did you get engaged???
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
