You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
