I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize