you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
