Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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