Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize