I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize
