If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
