He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I can't turn off my feet"
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Randomize
