The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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