i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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