he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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