at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
