My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She just used a chaser for red wine.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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