That's when you crack a 10am beer
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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