So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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