She's JV to your varsity
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
