ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
