are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
