your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
