you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
