Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
